What might Mom Do if a Child Asks to Live with Dad?

1. Don’t Panic! And don’t assume that you are a bad Mom, or that your child doesn’t love you. Do take a deep breath, and say that you need time to think about this.

2. When this request is made during an argument be sure to separate the argument from the request to live with Dad. Insist that the difficult conversation be resolved first - and that the discussion of where the child lives will be at another time.

3. Keep the lines of communication open. Let your child know that you and his/her father are considering this important decision. Listen to his/her ideas, but always keep child custody arrangements an adult decision.

4. If the decision is to change the child custody arrangement, be sure that your child knows that your love is there forever, and indicate that the arrangement has some flexibility. (As opposed to saying: “If you go, you may never come back”) He/She needs to give it some time.

5. If the decision is to keep the same child custody arrangement, both parents reafirm their love, and continue with the same arrangements.